61832

Joke of the Day

"I let people know that I'm no weirdo. I say ""I'm no weirdo!"" From that point forward, it's just a matter of keeping my mouth off their pets."

"I am opening a new restaurant... ...called ""Whatever. I Don't Care"". Gonna make a killing on date night."

"I can control what you do next in life. Made you click."

"A girl's best asset is her lie' ability"

"I like to tickle my girlfriend when we have anal sex Just for shits and giggles"

"Whats 2 + 2 ? A math problem."

"[sex-ed lesson] now, unroll the condom down over the bana- what is it keith? ""i ate my banana"""

"An Egyptian man won't accept that he is a bad swimmer, so he jumped into the river... He's still in the Nile."

"How to make-out - 1. Hold her close 2. Kiss passionately 3. Don't mention the budget deficit or your father"

"Home is where the Wi-Fi is."