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Joke of the Day

"Commented on a woman's french manicure. ""I like your tips"" ...let's just say she didn't hear me correctly."

"I just got a job as a triangle player in a reggae band It's really easy, I just stand at the back and ting"

"What doesn't belong: meat, eggs, wife, blowjob? Answer: blowjob You can beat your meat, eggs and wife but you cant beat a blowjob!"

"What's brown and sounds like a bell? Dung!"

"What do you call a bunch of chickens playing hide-and-seek ? Fowl play !"

"I was recently the subject of a joke. I chickened out of a fight, and crossed the road to get away."

"I wonder how Beaker from the Muppets came to work at Dr. Bunsen Honeydew's laboratory. Is he just there as a college intern, or is he a graduated beaker?"

"""We are out of oranges"" he said, fruitlessly."

"date: why are u talking to me like i'm a news anchor me: sorry i do it when i'm nervous. back to you, karen."

"Thanks God for Fast food! Lucky for us we do not have to hunt our own food, because I don't have the slightest idea where the hot dogs live."