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Joke of the Day

"Patient: Hey that tooth you pulled wasn't the one I wanted pulled. Dentist: Relax I'm coming to it."

"Why do we measure snakes in inches? Because they don't have any feet!"

"*For Harry Potter fans* What language do UPS men at Hogwarts speak? Parcel-tongue"

"What's the similarity between a gay man and a toothpick? They both poke around in old food"

"Why do only 99.9% of dentists recommend Listerine? Because the other .1% is too busy out hunting lions"

"My company moved offices and wanted to transfer my job to northern Canada But I was having nunavut."

"We were driving past the graveyard and my dad asks: ""Do you know why I can't be buried there?"" ""Why not?"" ""Because I'm not dead yet, Son."""

"That 0.1% of bacteria that no household product can kill is what will inherit our earth"

"How do you clear out an Iraqi bingo parlour? Call out ""B-52"""

"The Tsunami in Japan Everybody knows that the reason for the tsunami in Japan was because Magikarp was using splash all the time."