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Joke of the Day

"What's the definition of ""relative humidity"" in Arkansas? The amount of sweat you can lick off your fathers balls after sex."

"Telling my wife I'm taking her someplace fancy is my way of getting 4 hours to myself while she gets ready."

"""Welcome to fightclub you may now kiss the bride."""

"video games are cool because they let you experience fantastical power-fantasies. for example in The SIMS you have a job and a house."

"What should you always ask after someone says ""I'd fuck her, but only with a bag on her head""? Paper or plastic?"

"Why doesn't Barbie have kids? Cause Ken cums in another box..."

"What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? ""DAM!"""

"A verb tried to pick up a noun at the club... He wanted to conjugate, but she had to decline. Probably all for the best. She was right up against her period."

"You just know I knew my girlfriend was furious when I blew my load early last night....I could see it in her eyes"

"George Zimmerman knock knock joke Person 1:Knock knock. Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: George Zimmerman. Person 2: George Zimmerman who? Person 1: Ok good you're automatically on that jury."