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Joke of the Day

"What do worms and women have in common They both wiggle when you eat them."

"Why can't americans play LoL? They can't guard their towers."

"John 10:26 Holy shit I gotta get up for work!"

"SKRILLEX must be really clumsy... ...he just keeps dropping his bass"

"Why do mice have tiny balls? Not very many of them know how to dance"

"What did the farmer say when he found dynamite in one of his cows? This is a bomb in a bull."

"People say you are what you eat..... So I guess it's a compliment when someone calls you a cunt"

"A bishop walks straight up to the bar and the barman says You can't do that. Bishops can only move diagonally."

"The Feds say that marijuana has no accepted medical use, overlooking how it could help 20 million unemployed Americans not give a shit."

"I saved my girlfriends phone number as LOW BATTERY'. Whenever she calls and I'm not around, the wife takes the phone and plugs it to the charger unknowingly."