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Joke of the Day

"I've been busy. What are we unnecessarily outraged about now?"

"I was at a Chinese restaurant... when I realized that a duckling is a small duck. So I decided to cancel my order of steamed dumplings."

"How many house flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just the standard two, but I'll be damned if I know how they got in there."

"What's the difference between a fraternity and a gang? Gangs don't have to pay for friends."

"What do you call a wookie in concentration camp? Jewbacca"

"I wonder who coined the term money."

"Im surprised Mayweather can hug so well... despite all those domestic abuse charges"

"Why don't they have gambling in Africa? There are too many cheetahs."

"It's great that banks are nice enough to charge fees for using machines created for the purpose of replacing paid employees."

"When comedians die, why does everyone tell them to ""make God laugh""? You wouldn't order a dead carpenter to ""make God some bookshelves."""