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Joke of the Day

"Why do Jews get circumcised? Because Jewish women won't touch anything that's not at least 10% off."

"How many dead hookers does it take to replace a light bulb? At least more than eight, the light in my basement still doesn't work..."

"A police facial artist tried drawing a suspect's face... It was a bit *sketchy*"

"My wife told me she wanted kinky sex... So I gave her the ghomeshi"

"What did a black twin called his brother before they're born? Inmates"

"A man walks into... A chemical store and asks the man there for some noble gas. The man replies ""sorry, we don't have Ne"""

"What do you call little kids in Belgium? Brusselsprouts"

"Someone in the office keeps making decaf coffee & I've narrowed it down to that guy who never gets anything done."

"News: Coleen Rooney has flown out to Brazil with her two sons to be with Wayne until England's World Cup campaign is over. That's nice bit far to go for a weekend though if you ask me."

"They say drugs will hurt your long term memory but I kind of take pride in needing to Google the proper spelling of ""Bieber"" every damn time"