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Joke of the Day

"French toast I saw on the menu at a small restaurant 10% more French in your toast and I asked the waitress what that meant and she said. ""We swear at it"""

"If Jesus was on a penny they would call it a JC Penny I get sad every time I look in a mirror"

"It's been clinically proven that the most effective form of birth control I can use is: ""Just be myself."""

"I suppose I should be thankful that I'm a single adult. Life would be much more complicated if I were multiple adults."

"My friend kept nagging me to donate one of my prepositions to charity. Eventually, I gave in."

"What did the cannibal get when he arrived late for dinner? The cold shoulder!"

"[Forest] GF: Oh god it's a bear! Me: *Stuffs socks down front of pants* GF: What are you doing? Me: Making myself look big Bear: Well hi"

"I'd write a rap song... ..but i'm too Lay-Z"

"""You know what would make this rice even better? Racism."" - Pitch meeting for Uncle Ben's"

"What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? Elifino \ _()_/ "