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Joke of the Day

"I'm the most bashful person in the world, until you get me on the dance floor. Then I become the most bashful newborn giraffe in the world."

"What do you call a fish with no ""eyes""? Fsh"

"*at Starbucks* ""Ya I'll have the medium roast please"" *Barista insults him a lot but not too much*"

"why did the hipster burn his tounge? because he ate the pizza before it was cool."

"I found a dead girl on the golf course It was a difficult shot, but I was able to chip it over her head and right up onto the green."

"Oh thank God (what I think every time I enter an public restroom that's empty)"

"So a rhino walks into a bar... and several patrons pay their tabs and leave because they see the danger in this situation."

"There's a restaurant in hell. Their food is to die for."

"Tomorrow is the start of International Holocaust Deniers Month Maybe better suited for /r/ImGoingToHellForThis?"

"Me: yeah, I'm not going to make it in today. Boss:of course, this snow is crazy. Me: Snow?"