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Joke of the Day

"There's a man walking a tight rope. 100ft below him there's a man getting a blowjob from an 80 year old woman. What are they both thinking? Don't look down."

"I organized a threesome last night....there were a couple of no shows, but I still had a good time."

"I saw a homeless guy masturbating on the bus the other day... *Where does he get off!?* -**Hampton Yount**"

"What do you call a Japanese suicide bomber? Wasabi"

"Whoever told black people they'll explode if they talk quietly needs to let them know they were just kidding."

"A lady was spanking her kid for being a total brat in the grocery store so I had to step in and ask her if she needed me to hold her purse."

"On a first date: Her - So what do you do? Me - I am currently working on eliminating all cancers. Her - Wow, that's impressive! Me - Then I'll move onto Capricons."

"Q: Why did the engineer put a clock under his desk? A: He wanted to work overtime."

"It's the little differences that can be the most important. For example, the difference between getting laid at your high-school reunion and getting laid at your family reunion."

"What do builders use to make websites? Com.crete."