4945

Joke of the Day

"I've had enough of this shit. I thought to myself as i sat on the toilet for 3 hours."

"before guns were invented, armies had to throw bullets at each other and if a bullet touched you, you had to sit out until the next war"

"How can you tell that the toothbrush was invented in Kentucky? Because it is not called a teethbrush."

"I was the top student at Ninja school, but I failed because they kept marking me absent."

"A guy walks into a bar with jumper cables... The bartender says, you can have a drink, but ya better not start anything"

"If Lamar Odom would've died... He would've went out with a bang."

"What does a feminist and a tampon have in common? They're both stuck up cunts."

"What would Jesus do? Today, take Mary out to Olive Garden."

"What's the difference between you and a mallard with a cold? One's a sick duck and I can't remember how it ends, but your mother's a whore"

"How was copper wire invented? Someone threw a penny between two jews"