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Joke of the Day

"My ex got me arrested cause I used to sit outside her house all day. She thought I was stalking her but i wasn't, i just had her WiFi code."

"People that study meteors are called weatherologists"

"Why the young tailor couldn't finish his father's pants? Because he had no pocket money."

"Have some self confidence Mexican restaurants. Take that hamburger off the menu."

"My goal weight is not having to take selfies from such a high angle."

"I climbed a mountain yesterday Things were looking up until I got to the summit. It was all downhill from there."

"What do you call a crazy bug that lives in space? A lunar-tick"

"Cantaloupe... or Wontaloupe?"

"Where did the farmer find his missing baby horse? In the foliage."

"there are some really great cocktails you can have when it gets cold. Gin and coffee, gin and hot water, microwaved gin, go nuts"