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Joke of the Day

"We get it - ""Bacardi"" rhymes with ""party,"" ""bottle"" rhymes with ""model,"" and ""sex"" rhymes with ""text."" You rappers can stop rapping now."

"I'm so sick of unexpected character deaths for shock value. This is a terrible pilates video."

"What was the name of the film about a killer lion that swam underwater ? 'Claws.'"

"Have you heard about that new movie 'Constipation'? It hasn't come out yet."

"Sex with 3 people is called a threesome. Sex with 2 people is called a twosome. That explains why they call you handsome"

"My sex life is like a Pontiac. I usually find it on the side of the road."

"Did you hear about the man who took so much LSD he started spontaneously speaking Italian? It was a wopping dose."

"On a scale from one to ten, how obsessed with Harry Potter are you? About nine and three-quarters."

"Why do Italian men grow moustache's? So they can look like their mother."

"It's confusing for me too, but I don't need your money so you're going to have to be a nice guy if this is going to work out."