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Joke of the Day

"Go to a suburban neighborhood, find the meanest mom with the biggest glass of white wine, and bring her to negotiate your new car purchase."

"What do you call it when you do papercrafts with seaweed? Norigami."

"Japanese boy kills his grandfather... Pfft, youth in Asia."

"Girls are like tornadoes because in pictures it's like wow those look cool but in person it's all omg what do I do"

"Q: What did the tie say to the neck? A: I think I'll just hang around."

"Tiger Woods goes through 18 holes in one day... And he STILL has time for golf."

"I was in a gang once we used to carry pocket knives & wear all green with blood-red bandanas around our neck. Wait, that was Boy Scouts."

"What's a redditors favorite governing body? The Fedoral Government."

"My therapist thinks meeting women on twitter for sex is a bad idea. His wife disagrees."

"I was raised by my grandfather clock because my biological clock was never there."