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Joke of the Day

"Why don't they have driving lessons and sex ed on the same day in Saudi Arabia? They don't want to overwork the camel."

"we have ways of making you talk mr bond [introduces dave] this is dave, he's a vegan ""OK ENOUGH"""

"Noun: Son of a b***h!"

"[Very Racist] What is the difference between a black person and a bench? One can support a family of four."

"""Shake what your mama gave ya."" ""You want me to shake a $25 Macy's gift card?"""

"A soldier survived mustard gas in battle, and then pepper spray by the police... He's now a seasoned veteran."

"Why did the cowboy adopt a Weiner dog? He wanted to get a long little doggy"

"Fight Club, but instead of blowing up all the financial institutions, they reset all twitter follower counts back to zero."

"What do you call the iron-stealing, oxygen-depleting metalloproteins that lurk in the red blood cells of all vertebrates? Hemogoblins."

"First monster: I have a hunch. Second monster: I thought you were a funny shape."