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Joke of the Day

"How many kids does a sterile German have? Nein."

"What is it called when you are arrested for drunk driving and you extremely regret it? DU-WHY?!"

"Police Officer: You know, this is a one way street? Me: I was only going one way..."

"What's the difference between... A gold fish and a mountain goat? One mucks about the mountain. What's the difference between a police batton and a magician's wand? One is used for cunning stunts."

"How many telemarkers does it take to change a light bulb? 3. One to change the bulb and two to talk about how beautiful the turns were."

"Went to a skipping competition I didn't really want to, but I got roped in"

"The American education system obviously listen to Pink Floyd. They've left those kids a loan."

"Two drums and a cymbal fall of a cliff... ...ba-dum chhhhhhhhhhh"

"America is there land of opportunity, where if you work hard enough, you can make the business owners rich."

"I wish I could hang out with Gwen Stefani. We would discuss which shit is/isn't bananas."