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Joke of the Day

"Crack babies are really sad but meth babies are super productive."

"How do you know if the camera you just bought was made in Asia? If the shutter makes a ""crick"" noise."

"Newt Gingrich would probably leave the presidential race... if he learned it had cancer."

"I've never had personalized license plates, but don't worry, I still know how to waste most of my discretionary income."

"Why did the retired police officer decide to become a DJ? So he could still get to say ""Put your hands in the air."""

"Why do gingers hang out with black people? Because gingers have no soul, and black people have too much!"

"I went to see a gay magician's show last night. For his last trick, he disappeared with a poof..."

"Why do Native Americans hate it when it rains in April? Because it brings Mayflowers."

"I hope aliens don't land in the next few years, because this is a really embarrassing time for humanity."

"Get in on Syrian real estate now! The markets are exploding!"