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Joke of the Day

"What's the worst thing about getting bitten by a poisonous spider? You're probably Australian. EDIT: I mean venomous, not poisonous. I am sorry"

"Jesus: He who is without sin may cast the first stone *guy with no legs throws rock* Jesus: Seriously? ""You said 'without shins,' right?"""

"How do you make a dead baby float? Root beer and two scoops of dead baby."

"Breaking news: The Irish have come up with a new use for sheep. Wool."

"Did Ilean ever get in touch with you? ""Ilean who?"" I lean over and you kiss my ass!"

"Two snowmen were talking on a cold day... One of them said to the other: ""funny, I smell carrots too!"""

"Animals are more careful than human. Here is the reason. http://funnyentry.com/ny-pizza-rat-turns-to-cannibalism/"

"Why do spiders hate Area 51? It's a no-fly zone."

"My tattoos aren't braille, so do not sneak up to me & begin to feel them. Unless you're hot, then you get the secret taste option."

"Most of us can keep a secret. It's the people we tell it to who can't."