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Joke of the Day

"girls love us tall guys but as soon as we use our height to ""constantly slam dunk on them and their loved ones"" they stop replying to texts"

Next Joke
 
"My life coach just asked me leave because apparently she has ""other pedicures to do"" and doesn't ""speak English""."
"Boy: Dad dad there's a spider in the bath. Dad: What's wrong with that? You've seen spiders before. Boy: Yes but this one is three feet wide and using all the hot water!"
"What do you call a obese fortune teller? A fortune teller, you FPHer!!!"
"What did one cow say to the other? Just the udder day!"
"""Nope. Nope. Yeah right. Nope. Close! Nah. Nope. Almost! Hahaha, you're terrible at this."" - piece of popcorn stuck between teeth."
"Psychic fellatio It'll blow your mind"
"Starting a hammock company for kids called Kidnaps and maybe I need to rethink some things."
"Two guys walked in a bar and said.. The Game."
"I often cry after sex. But in my defence, I use a pretty big onion."