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Joke of the Day

"VW have got in2 trouble 4 falsifying data, apparently this is not d first time the Germans have been found guilty of lying abt gas emissions"

"Patriot - n. someone who wears a flag pin while moving a corporation overseas to avoid taxes"

"My friend tried to annoy me with bird puns But he didn't know toucan play that game."

"""that escalated quickly"" -idiot in an elevator"

"What's the difference between a baby and an ounce of Coke? Eric Clapton would never drop an ounce of Coke out of a window"

"The biggest flaw with the new Apple iCar Is installing windows."

"Why can't Miss Piggy count to 70? She gets a frog in her throat at 69! Wakka wakka wakka!"

"According to Proactiv commercials, people with acne are incapable of being happy AND finding love. Tough break, mutants."

"I asked my girlfriend if she could wake me up with oral sex. I woke up to her sitting on my face."

"Why Did 9Gag Cross The Road? To steal a Reddit User's post on the other side."