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Joke of the Day

"I don't always kill spiders, sometimes I stare at them a short while to see if we can reach an understanding"

"Explosive knock knock joke ""Knock knock"" ""Who's there?"" ""Allah"" ""Allah who?"" ""ALLAHU AKBAR!"""

"A mushroom walks into a bar... Bartender says, ""We don't serve mushrooms here!"" So the mushroom says, ""Hey come on, I'm a fungi!"""

"What is a businessman's favorite game? Call of Duty: Economic Warfare"

"Ways I'm like a tea kettle: 1) need water 2) start screaming when someone forgets abt me 3) could burn down a house but probably never will"

"I miss the days if you were angry while on the phone, you could slam it down without costing $400!"

"Indian restaurant I was at an Indian restaurant last night when the waiter came over and said,""Curry ok sir""? I said 'ok one song then fuck off.'."

"What happens when business is slow at a medicine factory? You can hear a cough drop."

"*Feels the cool breeze caressing my skin* Cool breeze: I have a girlfriend"

"No one spoil the ending, I haven't finished the iTunes user agreement yet!!"