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Joke of the Day

"The masochist asks the sadist: please hurt me. The sadist answers: No!"

"I used to think I was indecisive ... ... but now I'm not so sure."

"[ cookout ] Me: OMG this ketchup is amazing! Host: yea yea we all know you brought the ketchup"

"A report found 9 out of 10 bishops write with a fountain pen. Only God knows what the other one does with it."

"""Aloha, a bar,"" said a struggling alcoholic ex-Muslim in Hawaii."

"BREAKING NEWS: Scientists sneak up on Periodic Table, add element of Surprise"

"What did the pope say when he spilled the sacramental wine? Do we have any papal towels?"

"So this guy with a premature ejaculation problem walks into a bar... And I kid you not, he came out of NOWHERE"

"In a hurry? I'll tell you a joke about my penis. It's short."

"A termite walks into a bar... ...and asks, ""Is the bar tender here?"""