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Joke of the Day

"When a guy shaves his head bald and wears a sweatband, the top of his head looks like a stick of roll-on deodorant."

"Had a talk with 12. M: Do you know what a period is? 12: Yes, mom, it's the dot at the end of the sentence. M: ... 12: ... M: Good talk"

"The Awkward Moment When Your Dog has Girlfriend and you still Single"

"What's a theif's favorite dance move? Poppin' locks"

"What do liberal arts majors yell when overwhelmed? Oh,the humanities!"

"What's a three letter word for Hell? DMV."

"I used to be in a relationship with a Mobius loop It was very one-sided."

"The U.S. Army developed a pizza that stays good for 3 years. Finally, those billions in military spending paid off. Your move, Al Qaeda."

"So there's this guy that does nothing but masturbate and watch Netflix all day... Oh wait... That's me."

"What did the chopped wood say to the tree? Run!"