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Joke of the Day
"What kind of soda do dogs drink? Barq's Root beer."
Next Joke
"If you've never baked pot brownies in an Easy Bake Oven... then you've never wrote an apology letter to your sister with an Etch A Sketch."
"I've never been offered money for sex. Never been offered money to not have sex either. So there's that."
"I'm a traveling art collector, but not doing so well... I'm always in need of Monet to buy Degas to make the van Gogh."
"It was pretty hard to find a cheap way to get our son circumcised... ...But in the end we pulled it off."
"Do you guys like presents? Here I am!"
"I'm working on inventing an electronic Ouija board so that I can keep tweeting after I die."
"What does Putin's boyfriend say when he wants sex? Putin, Putitin"
"I don't like damp things For the moist part"
"Oh. You lost your phone and it's on silent? If you like it, you should've put a ring on it."