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Joke of the Day

"I kept reading a book about Gawker... But every page kept going back to Chapter 11"

"Women are like pickup trucks. Men with poor taste usually want to add a lift kit."

"Why is cellphone reception so good in Wisconsin Even the smallest towns have at least 4 bars"

"My friend's getting rich by selling photos of koi in clothes. He says it's as easy as shooting fish in apparel."

"What did one saggy boob say to the other? We better perk up or somebody is going to think were nuts."

"Are you Russian? Cause I'll be Putin my dick in your mouth tonight. (Don't use as a pick up line doesn't work)"

"Did you hear about these new reversible jackets? I'm excited to see how they turn out."

"Don't judge a man until you walk a mile in his shoes. Unless he wears Crocs. You just know he's a total douche jacket at that point."

"Women are kinda like engines. You gotta show them a little TLC to get all your money's worth out of them, and every now you have to choke them to get them to turnover."

"College doesn't prepare you for holding in farts in the workplace."