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Joke of the Day

"hey dudes who go through my Instagram and only like my hot pictures I can't wait to establish a long committed relationship with you"

"What's the difference between light and hard? You can still fall asleep with the light on!"

"Why doesn't Superman watch Game of thrones? Because he has a LED-TV."

"My wife hired a fact checker for when we argue."

"What's the difference between John Kenndy Jr. and Ted Kennedy? Ted can swim away from an accident."

"""Why your stomach is so big""...""That's the baby ... I had for lunch"""

"My girlfriend said she was leaving me because I never pay attention ...or something like that... I wasn't really listening."

"I am proud to announce that I have developed a foundation to aid abused women It's real thick to hide the bruises"

"The Grammar Nazis burst in. ""We know you're harbouring Jews, Mrs Gies"" ""There ain't no Jews here!"" ""Double negative! Search the attic, boys"""

"What did the sign in front of the Drug Rehabilitation Center say? Keep off the grass."