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Joke of the Day

"When my girlfriend told me she was pregnant, I wasn't prepared for all the changes I'd have to make... ...like my name, phone number, job, city where I live..."

Next Joke
 
"I have a fear of speed bumps but I'm slowly getting over it."
"I have an eating disorder; I'm about to eat dis order of fries, dis order of wings, and dis order of nuggets."
"Me: OK bedtime Mind: Hey let's think about stuff Me: No, sleep Mind: OK here are some horrible memories you want to forget Me: FUUUUUUUCK"
"6 and 7 are hanging out. 6 says ""you wanna grab a drink?"" 7 says, ""Nah, I aint ate yet."""
"Which US state is friendliest toward the Japanese? Ohio"
"No one in the Star Trek universe knows how to tie a neck tie. They're all use to Klingons."
"I always keep a taser on me in case anyone asks if they can have one of my fries."
"A hole has appeared in the ladies' changing rooms at the downtown sports club. Police are looking into it."
"Do you know what the scientific name of Viagra is? Mycoxafloppin."