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Joke of the Day

"Why are teachers happy at Halloween parties? Because there's lots of school spirit!"

"I asked my English teacher whether I should pronounce ""either"" as ""ee-ther"" or ""eye-ther"" He said, ""You can say either."""

"Give a man a plane ticket and he'll fly for a day. Push a man from a plane and he'll fly for the rest of his life."

"I don't get ""drunk"" during the holidays I get ""festive""."

"My illiterecy got me fired from the box moving company. I was so confused, I didn't know which way was up."

"Been to the hospital to get a mole checked. Apparently they all look like that & I should've just left it in its hole in the garden."

"What's the deal with Jerry Seinfeld? Did you ever notice he seems to start off all of his jokes in one of two ways?"

"Trump Alien Joke Trump claimed in a recent interview that he'd fund the search for alien life forms. He said he'd start by finding and deporting the ones in the U.S."

"*Me getting pulled over* Me:license and registration please? Guy police officer :I pulled u over.. Me:do u really want to argue with me?"

"Where did you leave your legless dog? Where you left him. And how do you call him? Doesn't matter, he won't come."