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Joke of the Day

"My electronegativity class in college was such a blow off class! I got an F on all my exams for the class, but I still managed to maintain a 4.0 GPA."

"The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was inventing single-ply toilet paper."

"I know why I study with the blinds closed. The reason awful, ghastly... I shutter to think"

"Girlfriend gone and no Internet. Just jerked off to Halo menu screen music."

"Why did Bowie die? I guess he was shot through the heart"

"Reddit's front page has more intellectual news stories than my local TV stations I don't understand it because I'm only 3 years old."

"If I worked in a restaurant.... on Valentines Day I'd put a fake engagement ring in every girl's drink."

"You can literally take anything from anyone as long as you shout ""police emergency"" and run away"

"My dick is so long if I laid it on the keyboard it would stretch all the way from A to Z .... ..... .... Wait... Shit..."

"Making a list of all the people who wrote ""Happy Birthday"" on my wall without an exclamation point so that I know who's secretly mad at me."