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Joke of the Day

"I'm behind 38 episodes of Game of Thrones. I'll just jump in the new season and piece it all together. Should be fine."

"Two scientists walk into a bar... first one says I'll have H2o Second one says I'll have a H20 too. Then he dies"

"Customer: What is this fly doing in my alphabet soup? Waiter: Probably learning to read."

"What word starts with F, ends with UCK, and people look for it when it gets a little too hot... A firetruck... .. You dirty person you... :-)"

"My wife said i was being immature, so i told her to get the fuck out of my fort."

"Why do all the elements get cranky once a month? Cause they are on their periodic table."

"This is your Captain speaking AND THIS IS YOUR CAPTAIN SHOUTING"

"What do you call a god who lacks self-confidence? An atheist. He doesn't really believe in himself."

"What do you call a prostitute that is bad at their job? Whorrible."

"What's the most depressed thing in the bathroom? The toilet. It always takes all the shit."