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Joke of the Day

"If a fish died in the ocean... ...does it become a marine corpse?"

"After a big tsunami in Japan, the Chinese began to hoard soy sauce. So I guess you shouldn't Kikkoman when he's down."

"What do you call a chicken takeover of the government? A coop."

"What does the math teacher do when he gets constipated? Works it out with a pencil."

"Putin's message to tourists: Visit Istanbul While he still exists..."

"Wish I had the confidence of a small child having a meltdown at the shopping mall."

"[sees girl reading The Bible] ""Ah I love that book. The way they just *clenches fist* buy all those frickin bulls."""

"My mom wanted to send me to a program last summer for people with ADHD... It was called a Concentration Camp."

"I think I have a premature ejaculation problem it seems to come out of nowhere."

"That bitch... Two necrophiliacs were chatting on the phone. One says to the other,""So how's the girlfriend?"" He replies, ""Eh, the rottin cunt split on me last night."""