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Joke of the Day
"""Two birds with one stone, how about all the birds"" God thinks, hurling an asteroid toward Earth"
Next Joke
"[On couch, notices it's 6pm] Luckily I don't have to pick up the kids from the Christmas party until 8. *Notices it's February* OH SHIT"
"I heard that Being the one to circumcise elephants doesn't pay too well But the tips are huge!!"
"God grant me the serenity to accept the fact that I cannot eat a meal without staining my shirt & the courage wear a bib in public."
"Why do we bake cookies and cook bacon?"
"I'm angry that only one company makes the game monopoly."
"Whats the difference between a shower thought and a joke? I don't know you tell me."
"Dark Humour - Baby in Blender Q : When you put a baby into a blender, why do you put her in legs first ? A : So that you can see the expression on the face........."
"My girlfriend lost all her hair during chemotherapy and she was crying for hours. I said, ""Why are you so upset? It's just hair. I'm the one that's gotta find a new girlfriend."""
"What do you call God in StarWars? A Skywalker"