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Joke of the Day

"reminder that Pop Secret was initially very poorly translated in Japan, where it was called ""Deceptions of the Father"""

"What is the difference between an amateur archer and a constipated owl? One shoots but can't hit... The other hoots but can't shit."

"Let's make this bar joke week. Here's one to start: A man walks into a bar. Ouch."

"Computer nerd dirty talk I'm going to stick my D: disk into your V: drive."

"For each like, I'll take a shot on New Years..."

"Why don't landmines work on Africans? Because they aren't heavy enough to set it off"

"""911, what's your emerg-"" ""The women at work have synced their uteri and it's Hell"" ""Sir uteri is not plural for ute-"" ""TAMPI EVERYWHERE"""

"What is the opposite of a Predator? a Postdator"

"What cell carrier do Mormons use? Virgin Mobile"

"If Sean Connery was in the bathroom and told someone what he was doing, it would sound like he was repeating himself. ""I'm shitting in here, pooping."""