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Joke of the Day

"Me: Can I have some of your candy? 3-year-old: Can I have some of your beer? Me: 3: Me: 3: Me: Deal. Wife: NO!"

"""No thanks, I filled up on breadsticks."" - Eve to the Serpent in the Olive Garden of Eden"

"I wish my wife was better in bed. <sighs> <disables autocorrect> I wish my WiFi was better in bed."

"Why do seagulls fly by the sea? If they flew by the bay, they'd be Bayguls!"

"Apparently I've switched to a mobile carrier named ""Searching..."""

"A giant lizard rebuilds Japan and the moonwalks into the sea. #ReverseAFilmPlot"

"What do you call a camel with no humps??? Humphrey"

"As a Brit I didn't believe Brexit could be Trumped But it seems that's exactly what's happened :("

"A Muslim tried to tell a joke It bombed."

"Not having a date on Valentine's Day doesn't really worry me... It's those 364 other date-less days that are causing me a bit of concern."