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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a gay dinosaur? A Megasoreass, What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A Lickalotopuss"

"Wanna hear a pizza joke? Nevermind. It's too cheesy."

"3 guys walk into a bar... ... the fourth one ducks."

"If I had a dime for everytime I thought about you... I would definitely think about you"

"What fish do road-menders use ? Pneumatic krill !"

"*strums ukulele* This one goes out to my ex wife, Lucy. It's called ""I know how much you hate ukuleles so I wrote a 9 minute ukulele song"""

"Ok so for next Halloween ill be mozart. ""I'll be beethoven!"" Yeah okay, calm down sally. So Mr. Terminator who will you be? ""I'LL BE BACH."""

"Twitter has ruined me. Just wrote ""we'll deliver your load on time"" for a transportation client and broke into peals of laughter."

"Yelling at me for warming towels in the oven is not going to get the fire department here any faster."

"Batman can safe the world ,but clark kent"