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Joke of the Day

"I am the boss of me. And my wife is my boss's boss."

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"Where does a zookeeper hang his laundry? On a clothes lion."
"Just been informed the man who stole my journal has died. My thoughts are with his family."
"My girlfriend said I was stupid for taking unnecessary risks. At least I think that's what she said. I was too busy trimming my pubes with a chainaw at the time."
"What's the fastest thing on land? Stevie Wonder's speedboat"
"What do you call an Asian woman with one leg? Irene."
"5 year old: ""That's a big truck!"" ""It's a moving truck."" ""ALL TRUCKS MOVE."" Why am I the one that feels like an idiot?"
"Why did the Jew prefer to sleep in the dark? Because the lights in his house were contolled by a switch"
"I sexually identify as a mosquito... ... Because everyone wants to smash me."
"What's the right age to tell a film that it's adapted?"