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Joke of the Day

"i was just singing radiohead's 'creep' into my cat's ear and he started meowing it along with me then we both took a shit in his litter box."

"What do you call a Japanese boy who just got beat by his dad after getting got masterbating? A fap happy jappy with a slap happy pappy."

"How do they play Pokemon Go in Gaza Strip? They grab a round rock from the ground and say: ""Pick-a-jew""!"

"I didn't see my face anywhere as a kid... ...then I realised it was right under my nose the whole time!"

"Kissed a receipt to lighten my lipstick but I need it to return something & now some cashier is gonna think I'm flirting."

"The Middle East Where you have to chose between a genocidal dictator or an extremist mob. (Well, except Turkey; they got it mostly together)"

"Here's a joke! Obamacare.... I can't afford it.... fml"

"I hate in your end. O. (innuendo)"

"I've just made an abortion. I'm not kidding."

"Did you hear about the girl who was dating the Berlin Wall? Things were going well, but it broke up."