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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the injured Carpenter? He hurt his widdle finger."

"I'm going to be filing a complaint with the shampoo company... My girlfriend recently dumped me and this ""No Tears"" stuff isn't working at all."

"So the other day I called my girlfriend fa- All family and friends are welcome to the funeral"

"How do tiny Mexicans cut their pizza? Little Ceasars"

"Jesus and Mary will occasionally appear on toast, or pancake, or waffles. Always breakfast foods. Why? Because it's the most important meal."

"What should you do when your girlfriend starts smoking?? Slow down and maybe use some lube..."

"I'm also not racist/ I think everyone should own a black person."

"Did you hear about the guy in the park dressed up as a duck? He was arrested for selling quack"

"Why do potheads only steal from other potheads? Otherwise there's nothing worth toking."

"""Get over yourself."" *Me teaching clones how to play leapfrog"