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Joke of the Day
"You hear about the guy who had his whole left side amputated? I hear he's all right now."
Next Joke
"Wish our neighbors would splurge on quieter hookers."
"Is it wrong to hate a certain race? I don't mind a 5k, but my running group wants to a 10k. I don't like them."
"[after 20 minutes of awkward silence in the sauna] ""This isn't the bathroom is it"""
"Everyone is normal until you find their Twitter."
"I was loving the song with the great beat in the lunchroom at work today when I realized it was the dishwasher running. It's great to be me."
"What do ducks do at Christmas time? They duckerate cookies."
"Thieves .. Thieves had broken into my house and stolen everything except my soap,shower gel,towels and deodorant.Dirty Bastards."
"So, Nintendo recently acquired a printing press Word is, they're printing ninten-dough."
"Man with premature ejaculation seeks understanding woman. Nevermind, I'm done."