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Joke of the Day

"Why is it so hot in a stadium after the game is over? Because all the fans left..."

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"Why did Kim Jong Un Instagram his missile? It was the only way he could send it."
"Who is the only superhuman Frozone can't deal with? Thor."
"Yo mama so fat she looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagon!"
"My friend was cold so i told her to stand in a corner. Corners are 90 degrees."
"Two toasters are sitting on a counter. One toaster turns to the other and says, ""Do you sometimes feel empty?"" To which the other toaster replies, ""OH MY GOD! A talking toaster!"""
"Pots and pans set: $70. Wrapping paper: $5. Tape: $3. Watching your mother unbox and attempt to wrap said pots and pans: priceless."
"What's the difference between a million dollar car and a pile of dead babies? There's no million dollar car in my garage."
"What did the blue crab call his ex girlfriend? Old Bay"
"If you had to choose between your SO and 1 millions dollars... What is the first thing you would buy?"