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Joke of the Day

"Why was the tomato blushing? Answer: ...Because it saw the salad dressing!"

"Men always say they like strong, smart women until you argue with them. And then they're all like: You talk too much....and I want my Mommy."

"Cool story bro, needs more dragons and shit - how Game of Thrones started, probably."

"I quit smoking cold turkey 1 year ago but sometimes I still get the urge to go into fridge and light up a slice"

"Neither candidate addressed the fact that we have a Hulk"

"Never trust an atom. Actually, it's probably fine. They only make up about 4% of everything."

"My friend, upon hearing that Chris Pratt will be in the new Jurassic World film... Are you looking forward to Jurassic Parks and Recreation?"

"What's the difference between a blonde and a pair of sunglasses? The sunglasses sit higher on your face."

"If the quiz made you a little quizzical, what is the test going to make you? Really fucking confused."

"Why can't Miss Piggy count to 70? When she gets to 69 she gets a frog in her throat."