195074
Joke of the Day
"Mom I forgot. Am I special or unique? No son. You're retarded."
Next Joke
"What do I do if my bank won't take my blood covered cash? Launder it. Source: http://www.reddit.com/r/personalfinance/comments/38kmj9/what_do_i_do_if_the_bank_wont_take_my/crwbpxe"
"Why did the chicken cross the ocean? To get to the other tide."
"Thomas Jefferson on cable TV news: ""The man who reads nothing at all is better educated than the man who reads nothing but newspapers."""
"Can someone tell me the exact crime I need to commit to get put on house arrest because legally having to cancel plans sounds incredible."
"My wifi has been down for the past few days... My wifi has been down for the past few days so I've been conversing with my family. They're actually pretty cool."
"I use proper syntax and punctuation on all of my tweets, unless I am in danger of exceeding the 140 character limit... & then u no how it b"
"Sorry about your lost dog. If you liked it, then you should've put a leash on it. If you liked it, then you should've put a leash on it."
"A1 Use this punchline to create a weird, funny tone... ""Listen, we need to sit down and have a long, hard, and possibly phallic conversation."""
"Eggs and Toast walk into a bar And the bartender says, ""We don't serve breakfast here."""