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Joke of the Day

"Way too young My friend just updated his status to ""I love my girlfriend <3"". I always knew he liked them young, but that is fucking ridiculous."

"My ex can't take his new girlfriend to basketball games because she gets pissed when the whole stadium makes fun of her by yelling REBOUND!"

"Me: What are you up to? Her: I'm making Chinese. Me: Cloning's unethical. Hahaha just kidding. Make me a math tutor."

"So the Dalai Llama walks into a pizza place... ... and says, ""make me one with everything"""

"Why don't gay necrophiles like to talk about their pasts? Too many skeletons in their closets."

"Chuck Norris is so bad he makes viruses sick. As such, Chuck Norris is also responsible for the eradication of smallpox."

"Dyslexic devil worshipper Did you hear about the dyslexic devil worshipper who soul his sold to santa?"

"""I"" before ""e"" except after ""Old MacDonald had a farm"""

"How do you kill a redneck? Wait until he fucks his sister and then cut the brakes on his house."

"What do you call a sad boner? Mourning Wood"