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Joke of the Day

"I make spelling mistakes alot and when I say alot I mean a lot."

"My wife looks for signs I'm cheating, but seriously, who would make a sign?"

"Why were the teachers eyes so crossed? She couldn't control her pupils."

"""Why do you always exchange your Canadian dollars to USD? It makes no sense!"" ""Well neither does the Canadian Mint!"""

"Zeroing a scale is a tare-able decision . . . I'm sorry"

"Did you guys hear the one-liner about the Monorail?"

"We can't really blame Donald Trump... I mean look at China; they built a wall and have almost no Mexicans."

"African conservationists call for the ban on hunting hippopotamus to be lifted, citing environmental concerns. To me the whole thing seems so hippocritical."

"I just spent 45 seconds deciding which Instagram filter to use for a screenshot of a text message. So, yeah, my life's going great."

"Being a father is the single greatest feeling on earth. Not including those wonderful years I spent without a child, of course."