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Joke of the Day

"Don't play the game where you listen to Mellencamp's ""Small Town"" and drink every time he says ""small town"". I just woke up in a dumpster."

"Back in Homer's time it was thought that ingesting small burrowing mammals would cure you of any injury. When the prince of Troy was shot with an arrow the doctor prescribed Paris eat a mole."

"Q: Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door? A: He wanted to win the No Bell Prize."

"I'd rather hear my parents describe how they have sex than hear a group of drunk chicks when their favorite song comes on."

"A bit computer geeky I feel bad for kids being born these days their grandkids will never know what an IPv4 address is."

"Q: What did the leper say to the hooker? A: Keep the tip."

"Cavemen were smarter than we think. Do you know why cavemen dragged their women around by the hair? It was so they wouldn't fill up with rocks."

"Sex with my boyfriend is like Ebay's customer support. I keep hearing please wait one more minute, and I just want the whole thing to be over with."

"*smoke detector chirps* me*takes battery out* *chirp* me*cuts wires* *chirp* me*smashes it with a hammer* *chirp* wife:We have more than one"

"What did the deer first say when he got to church? Deer God, please forgive me of my sins."