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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a sad gay Brit? Aaa bloody bummer"

"Your momma so dumb she drove around looking for the App Store"

"There is no number for what just happened in that bathroom."

"""I dunno, maybe you go steal an old lady's purse, you can hold up a liquor store, & you...just sit there looking mean."" -Unorganized Crime"

"My wife is upset we can't afford a vacation this year because I kept paying the kids to behave while I was driving"

"Dads are like boomerangs.... I hope. Edit: Guys I'm so confused, wtf is going on"

"When the first jackhammer was invented... ...it was a groundbreaking innovation!"

"*walks into Best Buy* *points to CDs* ""May I have 4 sound bagels please"""

"What are 3 naked woman on a crate of beer? In the way!"

"He said there was no spark between us, so I tazed him. I'll ask again when he wakes up."