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Joke of the Day

"Lady at my gym is pedaling a stationary bike while eating chips right out of the bag. I'm hiring her as my personal trainer."

"Working in porn for the free sex is like working at Chipotle for the free burritos Yeah, you're getting paid, but it destroys your asshole"

"What do you get if King Kong sits on your best friend? A flat mate."

"Everyone was dreaming of working for Steve Jobs except his pancreas"

"If it's any consolation, your Doppelganger is probably having a really awesome day."

"Patrick Star is so clueless It's like he lives under a rock or something"

"What do you get when you mate an elephant with a poodle? A poodle split in half."

"Indian Brothers & Sisters: You know all those awful things Columbus did to the Native Americans? Just remember...HE WAS LOOKING FOR US"

"Why did the Dick go to the 7-11? To get a Slurpee!"

"Did you guys hear about that actress who stabbed her waiter with her fork? Im trying to remember her name. Its Reese something. Help me out here...."