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Joke of the Day

"I'm so terrible at Chess. The only way I'll ever get to say ""Checkmate"" is if I eat at a restaurant in Australia."

"Australia I told my girlfriend I've been to Australia... I kissed her sting ray down unda'"

"Whoever lost a bundle of $20 bills tied up in a rubber band..I found the rubber band.."

"How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? ""That's not funny."""

"(Dirty!) Why was the guitar teacher arrested? For fingering a minor."

"Native Americans are all pissed that we took their land when they were here first... ..but we made reservations."

"How many Jewish mothers does it take to change a lightbulb? Oh.....it's fine. Forget about it. Seriously don't worry about it. I'm fine sitting here in the dark."

"Remember before Ebola, when we just had bola? Technology changes everything."

"My Pollish grandma was telling me about one of the worst periods of her life She called it the concentration cramp"

"Friends are like potatoes. When you eat them, they die."