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Joke of the Day
"I love long romantic walks to the fridge. That's how I maintain my curves "
Next Joke
"What did the maxi pad say to the fart? ""You are the wind beneath my wings."""
"TRIGGER WARNING National Rifle Association of America"
"Jesus christ, guys! Can we stop arguing about politics for ONE second and change subject to something more lighthearted? So what are your guys' thoughts on abortion?"
"I really need to get rid of this heavy copy of ""Farenheit 451""... Could someone lend me a lighter? Edit: FAHRENHEIT DAMN IT"
"Hey brotherrrr (by Avicii) There's an endless road to be disMOTHERed! Lmao"
"CAR GPS: turn left PHONE GPS: turn right C: who was that? ME: just a friend P: just a friend? ME: wait C: make an illegal U-turn ME: babe"
"I saw two lesbians kissing in the park. ""There's a time and a place for that,"" I told my wife. She said, ""Yeah..."" I said, ""It's 9pm and my house."""
"May the Fourth. Today is my birthday. The fourth hath always been with me. Even if I have a lithp."
"[coworker starts talking to me at my cubicle] Welp, nice chatting. This is my stop. [puts in earbuds]"