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Joke of the Day

"I dropped my phone in the bath. I dropped my phone in the water. I put it in rice to dry out, it works now but i lost all my contacts except for my uncle bens."

Next Joke
 
"China and Russia are having a friendly discussion... Russia: ""I bet you couldn't kill that group of Buddhist monks over there"" China: ""Do you want Tibet?"""
"Did you know there were vegetarians in Medieval Europe? More often than not, they were called ""peasants"""
"I don't speak button, but if I could I'm pretty sure the button on my jeans is saying, ""Aaaaah! Help me!"" right now."
"How do Mexicans keep their food warm? Chicken Fajitas."
"What do you call a room with no walls? A mushroom. Some people don't think that this is a joke. But it makes me rofl all over the place."
"You know what they say about hand jobs and homosexuals... They come hand in hand"
"Why didn't the polite coder get hired? The job required SASS"
"What couldn't the cross-eyed teacher do?.... Control their pupils"
"When the grid crashes and there's no other way of communicating, we'll see whose drum circle is ""stupid""."